16 Ways to Avoid Getting a Valentine Date

And it's nearly here. Valentines Day. For some, this day is full of love, flowers, chocolate, and a special someone. But many of you reading this, don't have a special someone in your life. First, I've got to say, that's okay! If God hasn't given you a special relationship yet, then you don't need it yet! Enjoy the freedom of singleness and celebrate the love of family and friends. And most importantly, the love of God. John 13:34-35 says . . . "A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." So, the following post is NOT meant to distract from the love of God.

   Last year, I did a post on 18 Excuses for NOT having a Valentine Date. This year, I'm doing a list of ways to AVOID getting a valentine date. You probably all know at least one guy. That guy who likes you, but you can't stand! That guy who tries to get your attention, but you try to avoid. Here are some ways to avoid him.

   Honestly, I ALMOST didn't post this because I don't want you guys to get the wrong impression. No, Priscilla is NOT against love and Valentines! No, Priscilla is NOT sitting here pining for a special man in her life. Yes, Priscilla is single, and open to God's leading in the direction of a relationship, but TOTALLY content where God has me. So, I apologize if this comes across wrong. I don't mean this to be rude, sarcastic, cruel, hopeless, or any other such nonsense. This is supposed to be purely comical. DISCLAIMER - I do NOT recommend doing all the things in this list, nor do I advise that you chase all men away!
   For those of you who have relationships, you may not find this the least bit humorous, but I hope all of you singles out there will let this bring a smile to your face. Think of that guy who drives you nuts, but always seems to be there. And this is written for girls . . . sorry guys, you're on your own. :)

  So here it goes.

16 WAYS TO AVOID GETTING A VALENTINE DATE

     1. Sing off key in public. A lot. Make yourself embarrassing to be around.

     2. Wear ugly clothes.

     3. ALWAYS go places with your brother as an escort.

     4. Cry a lot . . . in public. Maybe add some screaming too. Guys don't want a screaming date.

     5. Avoid mechanic shops. If you have vehicle trouble, get your Dad's help.

     6. Don't respond to texts from guys. If you have to respond, give dumb answers.

     7. Buy a costume engagement ring and wear it ALL the time.

     8. Never be seen alone. If you have to attend an event alone, spend most of your time hiding in the restroom.

     9. Stay home.

     10. Always talk about your latest diet. Pretend you hate normal food and only eat kale.

     11. Always talk about past relationships. Even if they're imagined.

     12. If you must go shopping, always pick a checkout line with a woman cashier.

     13. Get a job at a quilting shop. Or other location that men don't normally frequent.

     14. Avoid older ladies. They all have single grandsons that they want to introduce you to.

     15. Make sure you have other plans for that night. Volunteer to babysit if you have too.

     16. Go on vacation to Saudi Arabia. They banned Valentines Day.